When my wife and I had been married for just 5 months, I began to comprehend why already married couples told me – “when you get married you really learn what it means to die to yourself.” Don’t get me wrong, I love being married and I really love my wife. However, when I lived as a single man, everything in my life was sort of up to me. I could spend all my off time playing on my Xbox if I wanted to. I didn’t need to consider other people as I do now, there really wasn’t all that much dying to do.
Now after 2 years of marriage I’m starting to understand more of the big truth that marriage exposes: I am not perfect, I must change!
Marriage has revealed to me how selfish I really am, with my finances, my time…everything. What I realized is that I MUST become more like Jesus if I want even a shot at a marriage that glorifies Him.
“All of us, then, reflect the glory of the Lord with uncovered faces; and that same glory, coming from the Lord, who is the Spirit, transforms us into his likeness in an ever greater degree of glory.” 2 Corinthians 3: 18 (GNT)
This scripture speaks of the believer becoming more like Christ. As we look to Him we will see that we must become more like Him. This ‘looking’ fuels our desire to become more like Him. This desire is met by God’s enabling power and the result is visible change, us resembling Him more brilliantly, day by day.
In my marriage there have been many times when I have been selfish, it happens so easily. Seemingly small decisions like running ahead of my wife when we’ve been out jogging, only to realise how selfish I was acting and how much more important ‘sticking by her’ was. Small choices that reveal our hearts in a big way.
“I do not claim that I have already succeeded or have already become perfect. I keep striving to win the prize for which Christ Jesus has already won me to himself. Of course, my friends, I really do not[a] think that I have already won it; the one thing I do, however, is to forget what is behind me and do my best to reach what is ahead. So I run straight toward the goal in order to win the prize, which is God’s call through Christ Jesus to the life above.” Philippians 3: 12- 14 (GNT)
If Paul, considered on of the greatest followers of Jesus, said he was far from perfect, than I too can believe that I am in need of much ‘refining’. Fortunately, God has gifted me with this great vehicle called ‘married life’, to ensure I have every opportunity to become a brilliant reflection of my Saviour Jesus, degree by degree, moment by moment.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Chris or Spot as most know him is a young man passionate about God and people. Chris is employed full time at Joshua Generation Church and works primarily with the youth. He and Lize have been married for two years and Chris admits he’d be ‘lost without her’. He is also an avid sportsman and spectator.
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