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I Will Speak, I Will Risk

 

About 18 months ago as my precious middle daughter, Abby, was leaving our home after a time of prayer together she said, “Mom, I really feel like you need to step out more in the prophetic”. At first I was honestly a little offended and not quite sure what to make of what she had said. Although I had prophesied occasionally in the past, it was definitely not “my gift”. In my mind I began to raise my defense, the scripture says we all have different gifts, I love to serve practically and teach the scriptures, Im just not the prophetic type.

To me the prophetic type all seemed to be the artsy type of people (right brain people), with vivid imaginations whereas I am quite clearly a left brained person (logical). Besides, prophecy is a risky business and one of my biggest fears has always been the fear of misrepresenting God. I was afraid of speaking my own desires and words over people.

I did not want to speak out and ‘prophesy’ unless I was one hundred percent sure that what I was saying was the words of God. What helped solidify my position was my own experience- I had been with the church a long time and had received many prophetic words, and many were simply not accurate. Nope, it wasn’t for me, I was going to stick to studying and sharing the scriptures. But despite all these thoughts bouncing around inside my mind I still had a deep and growing longing to encourage people more effectively. So my ‘love/ hate’ relationship with the prophetic continued.

A little while later God gently confronted me once again with his word through 1 Corinthians 14, especially verses 1 and 5. I began to again ‘eagerly desire to prophesy’, fighting the feelings of intimidation as I observed those who seemed to operate easily in this gift. I even arragned to have tea with Melanie du Toit (a prophetess) and I shared my desire with her. She promptly invited me to join her on her next ‘prophetic assignment’…this was not what I wanted to hear and I was (very) relieved that I was unable to make the date.

Soon after this it was time for the Four12 European Conference in the Isle of Man and ‘lo and behold’, the very strong emphasis was on the prophetic. Many of the ‘team’ that had come to join for this time are all very gifted in this area. In one of the early sessions at the Conference, Andrew Selley shared on the manifestations of the Spirit during times of revival and mentioned the gift of prophecy and how he believed that Four12 as a movement of churches would be known as movement where every saint prophesies. Many people were given prophetic words over the conference time, including Will and I.

I will continue to treasure the scriptures in His presence, knowing that the gift of prophecy is not in competition with scriptures but rather flows out from them.

The prophetic word that I received began something like this: ‘I am opening up the prophetic well within you…’. Directly after this word a few ladies continue to minister over me prophetically, addressing things that have stopped me from prophesying in the past. I repented of my unbelief and was challenged to say out loud, “I will speak, I will risk”.

For the remainder of the conference week these same ladies kept encouraging me to step out and prophesy with my measure of faith (which I believe will increase as I exercise it), I did. I took the faith I’d received and stepped out as often as I was able to.

So the journey continues, I am still nervous, but I am determined to use my one talent and to refrain from comparing myself to others who do it better or differently (the gift of the prophetic has so many different expressions). Along with this I will continue to treasure the scriptures in His presence, knowing that the gift of prophecy is not in competition with scriptures but rather flows out from them.

So thank you Abby for the initial challenge to step out more in the prophetic, which I now understand is simply praying and speaking God’s desires for individuals and His church. My hope continues to be that I will be used of by God to edify His people.

 


ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Pamela serves alongside Will’ on the Joshua Generation Church eldership team as well as internationally within the Four12 partnering churches. A home bird with the heart of an adventurer, an avid reader, Theology degree holder, a ‘health nut’ and most of all a passionate lover of her Saviour, Jesus.

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